Back to basics

Wonders never cease. This week we have learned from our esteemed peers in the scientific community that there is no such thing as the vaginal orgasm.

See here for a representative report upon the latest findings, as written by Rose Troup Buchanan for the website of THE INDEPENDENT

Give me strength!

As someone who spent the best party of thirty years in the universe of women’s media, I should estimate that about 50% of most mainstream magazines aimed primarily at women since about 1970 has been devoted to matters relating to sexual behaviour, theoretical and practical.

Never mind the smutty, dirty-raincoat-brigade men’s rags that traditionally go up there – on any objective review – some of the activities represented in image form, reviewed, explained in graphic detail and encouraged in women’s monthly magazines should certainly have been ‘top shelf’ fare in our traditional newsagent shops these past three decades.

Somehow, it seems, if it happens to be set out within an expensive-looking cover, hidden amongst lush advertisements for perfume, hair products, jewellery and features on celebrity lifestyles, it doesn’t qualify as ‘porn’ – well, not when it’s contained in a product aimed at females.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for sex education and women claiming control over their bodies, sexuality and bedroom experimentation.

I’ve lost count of the times I’ve been advised by medical experts to locate parts of my anatomy I didn’t even know I possessed – and indeed the untold number of hours spent practising with various devices designed to assist – in everywoman’s quest for the ultimate orgasmic experience.

We’ve all been there. We’ve all felt failures if we cannot seem to reach sexual satisfaction in the manner recommended in endless articles in trashy self-help or sex problem columns.

For years now I’ve been telling all my girlfriends about my G-spot experimentations, my vaginal orgasms and God knows what else … now I’m panicking in case, courtesy of this new scientific research, that they’re going to realise that I’ve been making it all up.

That’s if I have, of course – I’m beginning to have my doubts either way now.

And then again … if I’ve been making it all up, then perhaps everyone else has too.

That’s another problem to add to my list of multi-tasking things to do today …