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Simon Campion-Brown needs a black coffee

I am personally devastated by the “No” result of the Scottish referendum. All my soundings, feelers, expectations and indeed earnest hopes were that the Jocks would vote for independence and leave the rest of the UK to go forward into a brave new world in which we would eventually dominate Europe, colonise China, Africa and North America … nuke Russia … and thereby save human civilisation upon planet Earth for future Millennia.

There is no point in raking over the embers now. The engrained dependent culture north of the border meant that that the average Scots man and woman knew far too well which side their bread was buttered and now the rest of the UK is stuck paying for them for the foreseeable future.

Like many of like mind with whom I have drunk hard liquor since midnight, I now intend to switch my energies wholeheartedly behind the campaign to gain a “Yes” or “No” referendum on the question of independence for England.

This now seems the only way to ensure that the one country in these islands capable of winning a soccer or rugby union World Cup is granted the tools with which to undertake this great task at all, let alone carry on to see it through.

Vote “Yes” for Prince Harry, England and St George!

 

 

 

 

 

About Simon Campion-Brown

A former lecturer in politics at Keele University, Simon now lives in Oxfordshire. Married with two children, in 2007 he decided to monitor the Westminster village via newspaper and television and has never looked back. More Posts