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The Tanner Report

I was in my local butchers, deciding whether it would be a Porterhouse or rib eye steak, and chewing the cud with Colin there. We laughed about the latest excuse: the selling of the playing fields. Of course we all know that the favelas are replete with fine pitches and sports pavilions. He said his nephew attend a football course but, so as not to discourage anyone, there are no winners. The essence of sport is to prove you are better than your opponent, so what’s going on here?

In the tedium of England’s bore  draw with Costa Rica I devised  my Fulham World Cup side. I cheated a bit as some of my picks did not wear the hallowed white shirt at the time of the tournament but no matter. It’s not a bad side that probably would qualify out of its group.

Keeper: Stekelenberg ( Netherlands)

Defence; Cohen ( England); Moore,  Parker  (England) Salcido (Mexico)

Midield; Dejagah ( Iran ) Haynes , Mullery ( England);  Houghton(Eire)

Forwards: Dempsey ( USA), Riedle ( Germany)

Subs Bocanegra, Senderos, Karagounis, McBride, Clarke.



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About Alan Tanner

After a distinguished military service in the Catering Corps, Alan Tanner did well in mufti with his chamois as a window cleaner. Sadly he had to retire after falling from the fifth floor of Danny Murphy's mock Tudor home. He spends his retirement watching and writing about his beloved Fulham whom he has supported for over 50 years. The Alan Tanner Report is sponsored by Tanner Crystal Clear Ltd, Window Cleaners to the Gentry. More Posts

9 Comments on The Tanner Report

  1. Avatar photo Mark Lawrenson // June 28, 2014 at 12:14 pm //

    Stek over Schwarzer (and Keller, he of The Great Escape, for that matter)?

    And no room for The Wardrobe?

    Don’t forget that these WC teams have more subs than the Indonesian Navy.

    • Avatar photo The National Rust // June 28, 2014 at 12:22 pm //

      Certainly Schwarzer over Stek. Not sure though about Keller. Has Lawro Yankee leanings? AT

    • Avatar photo The National Rust // June 28, 2014 at 12:24 pm //

      Don’t think many old fart Fulhamites would prefer Diop to Mullery who was sensational in 1970 when we had a proper England team and kept Brazil contained to 1-0.

  2. Avatar photo Mark Lawrenson // June 28, 2014 at 12:16 pm //

    And Ruiz has now surely earned a spot on the bench !!!

  3. Avatar photo Mark Lawrenson // June 28, 2014 at 12:17 pm //

    I do, however, agree with the omission of Eyong Enoh.

  4. Avatar photo Mark Lawrenson // June 28, 2014 at 3:40 pm //

    And how about Moussa Dembele — surely he makes the roster? Some regard him as the most talented Fulham player in at least a generation, and he’s a real factor on a Belgian side that could go deep.

    • Avatar photo The National Rust // June 28, 2014 at 4:01 pm //

      Personally I think Dejegah had had the better World Cup. I’m sure Luis Boa Morte must have played in the World Cup. A very talented player you may not know is Cliff Jones. George Cohen says he was the best winger he ever faced. He might have played for Wales in 1958 WC. Shame Dennis Turner not alive. He would love all this

  5. Avatar photo Motspur Parker // June 28, 2014 at 4:58 pm //

    Here’s another for you: Johnny Pants. 2+ very solid years at Fulham and, while at the Club, captained a Ghana side that was inches away from reaching the semifinals. Furthermore, your roster is light on fullbacks.

  6. Avatar photo The National Rust // June 28, 2014 at 5:20 pm //

    I could do with some central defenders too. Our best ones Brede H, Chris C & Alain G never made a World Cup. 2 excellent players as well as Cliff Jones played in 1958: Bobby Robson who played in 1962 too and Graham Leggat for Scotland.

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