Religious partying

Religious observation, ritual and practice and I separated irrevocably many years ago.

Like so many negative decisions, I did not wake up one morning to renounce my faith but rather a slow and gradual distancing from religion.

Most of my friends do not share my or possess any faith.

However my brother and his side of the family are my polar opposites. Indeed his son is  a rabbi.

So when I received an invitation for my great nephew’s bar mitzvah -a three-day celebration over this weekend – it was with some trepidation.

I do not like arrangements made a long way in advance as inevitably some thing else come up. Also there was little identification with a very different lifestyle.

The Friday night was prayers in the synagogue followed by a family dinner.    

I sat next to an interesting fellow who chaired various tribunals including those on military and mental health.  For his work he was appointed Rear Admiral and I was reminded of that line in HMS Pinafore in the Ruler of the Queen’s Navy song:

“Stick close to your desk and never go to sea

And you will be the ruler of the Queen’s Navy …”

So  far so good.

Saturday was The Big One; three hours of prayers in Hebrew with men and women separated.

One thing I noticed was the abundance of children, most of whom were extremely restless and chased each other around. I guess 3 hours was too long.

A Bar mitzvah has no exact religious equivalent: the nearest is the Catholic confirmation.

I had to leave the service to visit a pharmacy to get some emergency medication.

This proved a difficult exercise as, not withstanding a call from my doctor, they needed my NHS records which do not exist as I have a private doctor.

Eventually they relented with a 7 day supply.

Back to the synagogue.

It is customary to have post-service reception known as a kiddush.

The congregation descend like locusts and indeed some even take food away.

I stood outside and found myself under attack from biscuits thrown from up above. Food is plentiful but no alcohol.

I managed to get the favourite tipple of the orthodox (malt whisky) but then beat a retreat.

Today we had a non-religious party in the form of brunch.

The pastries were delicious – and the food copious – but the only alcohol was one bottle of malt whisky. I had an interesting conversation with my nephew’s wife who has borne 8 children.

She was pleased to have faith and made a point I had never thought of:

So many gadgets begin with i (iPhone and iPad), which she argued persuasively reflects an unhealthy self-obsession.