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The Tanner Report

The essential requirement of being a Fulham supporter is a sense of humour. I have laughed at the gallows humour in the shambles of appointing Felix Magath. One of my clients Gerry has been texting me. He first suggested he should take his tracksuit to the next game to see if he can get appointed. He then predicted that on the bench we would have not 6 subs but 6 managers.

“One to do circuits and 6 miles run around the pitch before kick off; one to tell the team to pass sideways; one to decide not to make any substitutions; one to buy poor players through his usual agent; one to shadow the manager should a vacancy occur; and the Chief Executive to pick the team”

On second thoughts Gerry should not apply and nor should I as our knowledge of Fulham and our fans automatically disqualify us.

We hear grim stories of Magath’s training methods which include scaling mountains but can he speak English adequately, can he drill our defence better and will he acclimatise quickly? The super fit Fallsturmjager (paratrooper) has to hit the ground running.

About Alan Tanner

After a distinguished military service in the Catering Corps, Alan Tanner did well in mufti with his chamois as a window cleaner. Sadly he had to retire after falling from the fifth floor of Danny Murphy's mock Tudor home. He spends his retirement watching and writing about his beloved Fulham whom he has supported for over 50 years. The Alan Tanner Report is sponsored by Tanner Crystal Clear Ltd, Window Cleaners to the Gentry. More Posts